im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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