well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Randomize
