i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Randomize
