My hand turned me down
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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