cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
