The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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