SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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