And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
