I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
is wine microwaveable?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
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