There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
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