Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You're like the curious george of whores
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
