I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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