My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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