we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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