i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize