what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
