I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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