And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
This is my gift to your gina
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
