He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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