She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
