this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
