brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
