it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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