Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
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