sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize