I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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