Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
