these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
