when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
