so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
