my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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