I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
