a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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