I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
