Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
