So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
