they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
