Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
