You're a womanizer and a bitch.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
