If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
