i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize