This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize