Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
