dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize