I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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