Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
