Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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