I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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