Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
