my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
